The Bible is an inspiration and powerful book of knowledge. It is the voice of God.The Bible was not put together for entertainment delight to everyone that lays hands on it. And neither was it put together to serve as a tool through which some dubious elements can manipulate others and deceive them as to what the Lord Jesus Christ truly stands for. No it’s not.
The holy book talks about God, His love for human beings,His desires g or us to serve e Him and the consequences of our actions ,when we do not live according to His words.
In more ways than one ,the Bible has shown us the rage,the anger and the awesome powers of the Almighty God.It I’d only the stupid and the foolish that would confront the Lord and trample on His words and everything that He stands for. And that is exactly what I have done. And now I am facing the grave penalties that come with my action…
I have sinned a great sin .I have offended man and God .This may sound incredible, but I truly never set out to do the things that I have done . I never did. But I guessed that ,if you consider the circumstances and the pressures I had to deal with at the time,and you were in my shoes, you probably would have done what I did. Do not misunderstand me ,Iam not least proud of what I have done.
Far from it. On the contrary, Iam regretting every bit of my actions; I was ruined the very day I decided to walk the road that I walked.
Some years back ,I was merely a struggling young man striving to grapple with the realities of the times. I ‘ve graduated some four years before then from the University of Nigeria Nsukka with a Degree in Mass Communication and had not been able to lay my hands on a solid job ever since. In between that period, I got a few jobs that I thought I could hold on to for a short while to keep body and soul together, but even those ones at a point became completely elusive. The pressure began to mount on me from all angles.
I had an aged parents to cater for and siblings to assist through schools. It looked as though, the gods had conspired against me.Getting a decent meal a real torture for me. I became despondent.I’d given up any hope for a better tomorrow until that fateful morning when Victoria,my girlfriend of many years came for a visit.
“Jerry , what’s the problem? “You don’t look very bright this morning.” She had said to me after she joined me on a 3inches bed where I sat.
Vic(so I called her), was one hell of a girl. We’ve been dating for a couple of years. yet she never allowed me access to her body.Anytime I demanded that e made love,she’d tell me she was a Christian and believed in sex after marriage.This got me really frustrated. Even when I tried to avoid her or do things that should ordinarily annoy any other girl,Vic would still come to me, showering me with live and doing the little she could to assist me financially and bringing foodstuff for me and my family.
“And why should I look right this morning?”I ‘d thrown back at her. “Is there anything to be bright and cheerful about?Look at me,Vic,Is this the kind of life I planned for myself? Of course not.It’s certainly not.For how long will I continue to search for an elusive job? How long will I continue to depend on others before I feed myself and family?I don’t think I can continue like this,Vic, this is becoming too much and embarrassing for me ….
At this juncture, I broke into tears.I just could not control my emotions anymore.To say the truth, I have done nearly,if not everything I thought any man could do to get out of the web of poverty. But I have not been that lucky.
Most of my contemporaries who did not even have good grade like me in school, already had lucrative jobs and lived a comfortable and enviable life. What then,in heaven’s name was the problem with me?
“Jerry, please stop crying “, Vic consoled me. “What do you want your parents and siblings to think if they see you this way? “You are supposed to be their source of strength,hope and inspiration, Jerry. I advice that you should be strong for them at all times”.
My mind was blank. I was not even listening to her.Thr eruption of emotions within me will not let me . So the tears continued rolling from my eyes.
“Listen Jerry, crying will not solve anything.You have got to be a man”,Vic echoed.
When she realised that I wasn’t willing to listen to her, she said,”there is a suggestion that I have,Jerry. It’s something that I have mentioned to you sometime ago but you would not want to hear it then”.
“What’s that?” I asked her, sobbing as I did.”Remember what I told you about becoming a worker in our church?The salary might not be much ,but it’s something. Please , Jerry, think about it.This will at least solve for you and your family the problem of feeding.”
I gave it a long thought and made up my mind. I had little or no choice.Thete was only one option left for me.
“Alright, how do I get this job? When Am I supposed to start?” I demanded. At that very moment ,I could have decided to take just about any job that was thrown at me
“Em,Jerry ,I’m afraid ,it’s not that straight forward ” Vic said ,looking slightly uncomfortable as she talked to me.
“Not that straight forward? Why? I have better qualification than I could even need for a job in any church in the world!” I was slightly getting upset now.
“Oh, come on ,Jerry, it’s not about your qualifications …..” Then it’s about what? It’s about your life hi Christ,Jerry,” she finally let it out.” This something I have been begging you for all these years. You have got to give your life to Christ to be able to benefit from the opportunities in my church.
Will you give yo our life to Christ Jerry?”
Now ,that took me a while before I could finally make up my mind.Again, I reasoned; did I have another choice?I didn’t think so. I was a beggar,making a choice is was certainly not part of my privileged.I could only be very glad that I had one to take.
I gave my life to Christ.Or do I thought I did. I was put through some few tests,while Vic used her influence in the church to help waive some other screenings that I should have undergone. And soon, I became a salaried and active member of the church.
To my surprise, I discovered that I was beginning to enjoy my new job.Subsequently, I grasped everything I was taught about the word of God and the Bible became my second companion.
The fact that I have always been a good looking young man and had my background in Mass Communication began to pay dividends for me. My speeches,my delivery of the scriptures, and of course my looks all added up to make me a doyen in the church set up. Not quite long, I rode through the ranks and soon became one of the strongest hands in the church.But deep down inside of me I was a completely happy man.
While everyone was happy for me and some envied me and aspired to emulate me,I was depressed inside. Do you want to know why? I:LL tell you. I was deceiving men! I sinned against God and man by doing that which God despised to no end, fornication!
I think it all began with the attention I was getting from women.Thry just would not let me be.Thry would come to me,seeking one favour of the other and then end up on my bed before you can day,”Praise the Lord!” I was making money. The wealthy people in the church made sure I never lacked.But all these monies I spent on my numerous girlfriends and hotels.
Now ,the Lord has decided to unleash His anger on me. He had had enough of me and decided it was time He visited His wrath upon me.And His anger came in form of a strange affliction.
I woke one morning to find sores on all over my body.Before anyone could do anything about it, my body has been enmeshed with sores.
The senior pastor s who prayed for me already know the cause of my problems.The Holy Spirit had told them much about me.Now they insist that for me to get a divine healing , I would need to confess my sins before the church congregation.How can I do that? How can I face the shame? Somebody please help me ….
*Readers comments or advise are highly honoured.